Younger Self (ys): So, what if… I had chose to pursue my art?
Older Self (os): Well, back then, there were two main choices for me, follow the practical path, or follow your dream.
ys: And how did you make the choice?
os: It was not really that tough a choice to make. I had already done a good amount of my art, so I had some measure of my abilities.
ys: So what was the verdict?
os: I did not like it. I did not think I was anywhere good enough, and I wasn’t getting that much better. Was I prepared to be the “starving artist”?
ys: Were you?
os: No, I wasn’t. I had many other interests, but the main motivator was money. I needed to be able to earn a good living, and that would support my other interests, which in time, would be worked on, practicing, and getting better at, and someday, make the jump when the time was right.
ys: So, what am I supposed to be? Am I supposed to be “starving artist”?
os: Yes, in a way. At least, you are me at that other branch. My “What if”.
ys: Aren’t you getting off on a bad start with the “starving artist” stuff?
os: Not at all. That is what I was thinking at the time, so actually, if I did make the decision to pursue my dream, well, then I would be putting all my effort into it, and not be the “starving artist”.
ys: It’s still futile, because once all my new stuff (which is your old stuff) is published, then it’ll just stop cold because there is no new stuff to put up.
os: Yes, that’s correct. I wasn’t sure what to do about that yet.
ys: Oh great. I’m just some throw-away, who will disappear once this is all done.
os: If that’s where it leads, then yes.
ys: Well, then can you at least give me a full life story?
os: Sure, I can do that. That was on the list. You might not like where it goes from time to time.
ys: That’s life.
os: Yes. Yes, it is.